Twenty years ago the ringing sound of heels on a metal staircase marked the beginning of a new chapter in my life, only I didn’t know it at the time.
The most pivotal moments in our lives quite often announce themselves with great fanfare. Weddings, the birth of a child, the passing of a loved one are key events after which our lives, for better or worse, are changed forever. However, sometimes these moments sneak up on us with a whisper instead of a shout. When they occur they may feel like just another moment in a day filled with moments, it’s after the fact when we realize their significance. I guess you could call it delayed gratification. I had one such moment on April 21, 2001. It was a beautiful spring evening and that was the day I met Carol, the love of my life and the mother of our two children.
Two decades have gone by and I still have vivid memories of that day when Carol came into my life. She and I were introduced by a mutual friend named Dannielle. Dan and I had a warm and easy friendship. We laughed a lot and enjoyed spending time together. A couple of months prior to meeting Carol, Dan began talking up this “dancer, teacher, world traveler, Deadhead (Grateful Dead fan)” friend of hers. So I’m hearing all of this and all the while checking off boxes. I was definitely intrigued and told Dan that I wanted to meet this mystery woman. I was single at the time, in a good space in my life, and ready for something new.
After some back and forth, Dannielle managed to arrange a day for Carol and I to meet. I was living in Santa Cruz at the time. Dan and Carol both lived about three hours north in Sonoma County. I made the trip north on that fateful Saturday to Dan’s apartment where my meeting with Carol was to take place. I was helping Dan do some painting in her place that afternoon. Butterflies of excitement fluttered through my stomach as we sloshed various colors of paint onto the walls. I was trying not to have expectations and just let events unfold as they may.
Dan’s studio was behind and above a family’s home and was accessed via a winding metal staircase similar to the type used to ascend to the top of a lighthouse. The appointed time of our rendezvous had arrived when I heard the clomp and ring of heeled shoes on metal. The door swung open and in flowed Carol. This is the memory that is so crystalized in my mind, the way Carol literally flowed into my life.
Her river of hair, red as a robin’s breast, spilled out of a colorful head scarf, cascading down past the middle of her back. The swish swish of these long tresses was perfectly synched to her graceful movements as Carol sashayed into the room. Her thin and lithe body was draped in a light brown, long sleeve peasant style blouse. A vividly printed skirt flowed past her ankles. Carol’s electric blue eyes were turned up to their full brightness that evening. Her big toothy smile was warm and welcoming, the freckles on her face a nice punctuation mark.
Our actual date was fairly uneventful. The three of us went to a bar, had a couple of beers and listened to a bluegrass band. Carol and I got together again the next day for a hike in the redwoods. The seeds of our relationship had been sown. How could I have possibly known at the time how that day would alter the course of my life? It was a moment in a day filled with moments that was the beginning of a beautiful life shared.
